So, after wrestling the rugrats to bed last night Ben and I were actually asleep before 10:00. I'm assuming this is why I was wide awake at 2 a.m. and officially couldn't sleep anymore at 5:30. I have no problem with waking up early, you know, breakfast with the birds, watch the sunrise, etc. But 2 a.m.? Seriously? Fortunately I did get something out of the deal - an epiphany. Some people get them in the shower or while gardening or driving or dreaming. Mine come knocking at 2 a.m. I'm lucky like that.
Ok, the funny part is I can't tell you exactly what the epiphany was because I'm paranoid about government conspiracy to steal my idea before I get it patented. Actually I'm still trying to sort it out but here's the jist. (jist? Gist? Jest?) I have been wanting to use this time I have while recovering from surgery to write or research or something I don't normally get to do much of when busy chasing rugrats. My real hope is that I could create a habit of writing so that when I am with my girls again fulltime I can have the discipline of routine to continue writing daily. I have always wanted a daily writing routine. The one time in my life I really stuck to it was my junior year in college when I had to keep a journal for a humanities class. I loved it. I think I was a healthier person during that time and even if that is all that comes from my writing habit it will be worth it. But just between you and I, our little secret, I would love to really write and be published someday. But first the habit.
So I got this idea for a project, I'm keeping the project title secret for now (the patent thing, you know) because its the best part. But basically I plan to write up a survey of sorts with interview questions asking people to prove they are alive and prove being worthy of life. I know, I know, it's either clever/insightful or morbid, depending on how you look at it. I'm trying for the former. I'm truly curious to understand what an individual thinks of herself and her relationship to life. At 2 a.m. I had goals of taking the information I receive and analyzing it socialogically, phsychologically, culturally, in light of technological advancements, demographically, and so on .. but that was at 2 a.m. when for some reason I think I can do anything I want to and live to tell about it. For now, the habit.
Maybe I'll test out some questions on ya'll soon. You can leave annonymous comments here so it's perfect testing ground. Oh yeah, I realize I should be using this blog to keep you all informed about my recovery and how the family is doing and all.. so I'll try to do that soon. For me though, right now, it's good to remember there is something to life besides all that... Like 2 a.m. epiphanies!
